The Paradox of Choice

I despise buying jeans.

Going into a jean store is stressful…there are way too many styles- boy cut, relaxed, faded, torn, embellished, skinny, jeggings….and within those options, 20 different colors!

Typically I end up trying on 15-20 pairs, asking the sales girl a million questions “Will they stretch? Will they shrink? Will the color fade?” before deciding on one overpriced pair that I’m not all that satisfied with.

It’s really annoying!

My jean-buying experience is typical of our society where choices are abundant and anxiety over making the right decision is overbearing….or so says Barry Schwartz, author of the book Paradox of Choice- Why More is Less.

I picked up his book awhile ago and recently found the time to sit down and read it. In the book, Schwartz argues that having too many options  often leads to depression and feelings of loneliness. He says:

“People can’t ignore options – they have to pay attention to them. If they make a choice, is there another choice would have been better? There’s more effort put into making decisions, and less in enjoying them. What’s nagging is the possibility that, if they had chosen differently, they could have gotten something better.”

Living in a big city, I find this logic hits close to home. Getting dinner on a Friday night often turns into a whirlwind of decisions that need to be made – where to eat, how to make the reservation, how to get there, what to order…at times it can take the joy out of the experience!

And when it comes to major decisions like who to marry, where to live, what job to take? Well that’s even more difficult. Schwartz says:

“I find that people have an incredibly hard time making important life decisions and the more talented they are the worse it is. Because if you’re very talented and have cultivated many of those talents you are both interested in a lot of things and good at a lot of things.

I think it’s totally debilitating, and people graduate from college and start what they think is going to be a year but often extends into the indefinite future trying to figure out what to do. “What kind of person am I going to be, where am I going to live, anything is possible. This is one of the benefits of freedom and affluence, I should take advantage of all that.” But then the time comes to choose and people don’t know how to choose.”

I hear ya Schwartz!

The book discusses so many more facets to this issue- so if you’re interested, check it out. I want to hear from you though.

Do you struggle with making everyday decisions? How often do you second-guess a decision you’ve made? Do you strive for the perfect choice or are you satisfied with an OK one?

Rebuilding Haiti, One Gift At A Time

My favorite gifts to give and get are those that have a story behind them. Something that makes the present thoughtful and special beyond “I picked this up at a department store.” That’s why I love Etsy, where everything is handmade, so much.

This weekend while in Miami for the Blogalicious Conference I learned about a wonderful campaign Macy’s is doing called Heart of Haiti, which is bringing beautiful, hand-made Haitian art to the US.

Despite the horrific earthquake that devastated Haiti this year, many of the countries most talented artists are using raw materials to create beautiful works of art.

Macy’s recognized the potential these artists have and purchased 20,000 products up front, with help from Fair Winds Trading and the BRANDAID Project, to effectively get money into the hands of the artists quickly.

Check out some of the amazing gifts including items made from recycled scrap metal:

These hand-painted, pieces of art.

And even gifts made from old recycled oil drums.

You can browse all the Heart of Haiti gift items on Macy’s website.

With gift-giving season just on the horizon, I can’t think of any other practical, unique gifts that tell such a compelling story than the items for sale through Heart of Haiti. Even better- they’re cheap! Nothing on featured above is more than $60.

How amazing would it be to be able to tell someone that the gift you bought them was hand-made by a Haitian artist who is using his/her artistic ability to help rebuild their country?

I hope you’ll consider making some of your holiday purchases from the Heart of Haiti collection!

On The Road Again

Hi Friends! We’re back from a week in California!

Our vacation was really fun and we pretty much did everything I wrote about in my pre-Cali blog post. I am in the process of uploading pictures and promise to share some of my favorites with you next week.

I wish I had more time to expound upon everything we did, but I’m actually headed back to the airport today for another trip! This time I’m going down to warm, vibrant Miami, FL for the Blogolicious conference.

Blogolicious is very similar to the BlogHer blogging conference I went to in New York in July, but it’s focused on multi-cultural bloggers.

Although I know less bloggers going and none of my co-workers are joining me, I am pretty excited to spend the weekend in Miami at the Ritz Carlton, South Beach no less! Just check out that pool — not that I’ll be sitting beside it AT ALL ;)

I’m pretty excited to meet and get to know some new bloggers that I haven’t worked with before. Something tells me Miami is a great location for all of us to let loose and bond.

Who knows, maybe I can convince some of them to join me for a trip to Dash (the Kardashian sister’s clothing store. Yes, I admit to loving the Kardshians. Khloe is my fav! ) before dinner. :)

What do you guys have on tap for the weekend?

Le Dinh Hon – A Vietnamese Engagement

Hi Batty Life readers! Thi here, again.

It’s been a while, but I’m a friend of Liz’s and wrote a guest post about a year ago. A lot has happened in that past year…I got engaged, had some parties, showers, a bachelorette and fast, fast, fast forward…am getting married in about 10 days!

Tea, anyone?

My fiancé Cory and I were doing our video e-sesh last Friday (I know, what’s a video e-sesh?!? We’ll soon find out). Our videographer Caleb Condit asked us to talk about all the events and celebrations we’ve had during our engagement. While we’ve enjoyed so many special times with our closest friends and family, we spoke most proudly about our Vietnamese engagement tea ceremony.

As a first generation Vietnamese-American, I’m so lucky to have the opportunity to celebrate to very distinctive ceremonies. From the beginning, Cory and I knew we wanted to incorporate Vietnamese traditions into our wedding planning. For my parents, it was as important to host a tea ceremony at our home for friends and family as it is for Cory’s parents for us to get married in a church. So, while most were enjoying their Labor Day BBQs, we were enjoying some engagement TEA!

The Ceremony – Le Dinh Hon

A Vietnamese tea ceremony is typically held to announce an engagement or to celebrate a wedding – but in both cases, the rituals are the same. The day starts with the groom’s family processing their home to the bride’s home. They come bearing seven (a lucky number in Vietnamese tradition) gifts  such as jewelry, tea, alcohol for toasting, cakes, fruit and usually a roasted pig, which they offer to seven representatives of the bride’s family before asking permission to enter the home.

While I was in hiding, my parents invited Cory’s family and friends into the home and respectfully accepted their gifts.Cory’s family shared their intentions and asked for permission for Cory to propose to me. My dad, a man of little emotion, tearfully accepted Cory into our family and offered his blessing. I’m bummed I didn’t get to see this first-hand.

Afterwards, my mom walked me out to the ceremony, where Cory saw me for the first time wearing the traditional Vietnamese ao dai (which he was wearing himself). He and his family offered me gifts of jewelry and we were…tada, engaged again!

As a sign of respect and appreciation, we offered our parents and family members tea. In return, family members shared their blessings with us in support of the union.

The Reception

After the ceremony, we enjoyed a light brunch at my parent’s house. Then, in typical Vietnamese fashion, we were off to a local Chinese restaurant a short 30 minutes where we enjoyed a lovely seven course meal!

I’m feel so incredibly lucky to have shared such a special celebration with my parents and Cory’s family. It was so important to my parents and I was so touched to see how respectful, open and proud Cory and his family were to take part in such a unique tradition.

Have you ever celebrated a special wedding custom? Please share with us. I’d love to hear about it!

Seven of my favorite photos from the day:

Getting ready with my mom…

Cory’s family and friends come bearing gifts…

I come out for the first time…

Cory “re”-proposes…

Cory and I offer tea to my parents…

We took a few photos after the ceremony…

Our dads share a few speeches at the reception…

(Photos by Audra Buchanan)