We finally came to a decision on Mexico after a lot of time talking about it, and have decided not to go. I almost feel bad writing that – like I’m disappointing all of you who commented that we should go for it.
At the end of the day I just had a lot of concerns about living in Mexico with a baby while Luke was gone a lot. If this was three years ago, before we had Lila, I think I would have been up for it. But I guess I felt like moving to Lake Tahoe was our “adventure” and now as a new mom, I need some stability.
I’ve picked up and moved to a lot of new places in my life – New York City, Myrtle Beach, Chicago, Germany, Lake Tahoe – and I have learned that while these experiences are exciting, eye-opening and fun, they also can be really lonely until you find your niche.
We have finally (after three years) gotten to a place here in Nevada where we have a community of friends. And with Luke’s brother in town and my sister’s family a four hour drive away, I just didn’t want to have to start all over again … in a new country … where I don’t speak the language.
Throughout the process, I felt like I was being somewhat selfish. Wouldn’t a good wife support her husband’s career at any cost? But I just had to be honest with myself and with Luke. We both agreed that unless I was excited to go, that it wouldn’t work.
I tried to get myself there by researching the city, joining expat forums and listening to Spanish lessons on tape, but each morning I woke up with a feeling of dread that I just couldn’t shake. I truly felt I would not be happy there and three years is a long time to be unhappy.
Luke and his company have been very understanding and supportive. I know it must have been hard for him to turn down such a great career opportunity, but I’m lucky to have a husband who values the happiness of his family over his own ambition. Plus we’re confident other opportunities will present themselves. Luke is incredibly smart and hard working, so he tends to find opportunity wherever he is.
So that’s that. I am really relieved to have that decision behind us. Thank you again for all your advice and support.