Author Archives: Liz

Life As a Landlord Part Two

Posted in Daily Musings, Liz's Life by

Last you heard about my adventures in being a landlord, I had just finished the scariest showing ever, which included smashed toy sharks.

Anyway, after a few nasty emails back and forth between my sister’s husband and “John,” it was clear the goodwill was gone.

Of course, a day later we got a call from another person wanting to see the apartment. We debated waiting to show the place until after John was moved out, but decided to try to prep the prospect to see if they could look past the smoke scent and collage of scantily clad women in hopes that a months rent wouldn’t be lost.

I met the two girls outside of the condo and gave them a little pep-talk.

“So we have an odd guy living in the place now. He just had surgery, so he will be there when we get there…and he smokes…inside….and he’s quite messy.”

I promised them that the place would be cleaned, fumigated, STARCHED…whatever it took to get John’s remnants washed away forever. I also gave them the added bonus of getting to choose the new paint colors.

I used my key to open the door to the condo and a woman with dreadlocks AND a DOG answered the door. “Uh, hi. We called John a few times today to let him know we’re showing the place. Is he here?” She told us she’d go talk to him and shut the door on us!

“I’m really sor”…I started to say to the girls when John appeared IN HIS TIGHTIE WHITIES. (this man clearly has no shame).

He let us know that he had “no idea” anyone was coming over, but that but “he guessed” we could look around as long as we were quiet because he was getting a CRANIAL MASSAGE in his living room.

Sure enough there was a massage bed set up where the mattress once was in the living room and the dreadlocked lady was all set to work her hippy magic on his head. So uncomfortable.

I hustled the girls through the apartment, trying to speak in a low voice so as to not interrupt the in-home spa session taking place in the living room. We made it to the master bedroom when I realized there was another girl there….in his bed.

Again. So awkward!

And confusing….this man is not attractive yet seems to have women on the mind and in his life all the time. Bizarro.

Despite the condition of the condo, seeing a strange man in his underwear and the overall uncomfortable 10 minutes, the girls seemed genuinely interested in the condo.

Please, for the love, I REALLY hope they rent it. I don’t think I can go back there and face John and his smashed toy shark (yup, its still there on the back deck) again!

Life As a Landlord

Posted in Daily Musings, Liz's Life by

Ok, so I know I told you I was really busy and couldn’t write this week, but then some really absurd things happened and I HAD to write them down. This is a two-part story, so I’ll start from the beginning.

When my sister and her husband moved out of Chicago for their careers, they left behind a condo. It was about this same time I became a default landlord. :)

The first couple years as a landlord were fine. I showed the apartment and within the first two showings it was rented. The tenants didn’t bother me once moved in. I was happy with my once a year responsibility.

That was until we decided to rent the place to “John.”

After living quietly in the condo for a year, John, who was always a bit odd, let us know that he was moving out at the end of his lease. We immediately listed the condo and booked a showing within days with a married couple.

When we told him we’d be by to show the condo, John let us know that he recently had back surgery and was bed-ridden, so he’d be in the place when we showed it. Alright, sort of awkward, but whatever.

I hadn’t been in the apartment since John moved in, so I wasn’t sure what kind of condition we’d be walking into on the day of the showing. Just as I led the couple up the stairs and told them what an amazing unit the condo was, we were hit with a wave of cigarette smoke…from the hallway.

I nervously opened the condo door and the smell was so overwhelming I actually coughed! I glanced around and realized on top of smelling like crap, John had absolutely no furniture besides a mattress placed in the middle of the living room, a pair of WOMEN’s UNDERWEAR hanging from the mantel and a home-made collage of scantily-clad women ripped out of magazines and lovingly placed above the fireplace.

On top of that, there was stuff everywhere! The second bedroom was so filled with boxes of old clothes and junk that you couldn’t even open the door. And John was in bed in the master bedroom….with a questionably limited amount of clothes on.

The kicker? The back deck had absolutely no chairs, furniture nothing….except a smashed toy shark. Yup. A SHARK.

I. wanted. to. scream.

The couple looked thoroughly horrified and ran in and out of the condo in about 30 seconds flat. (I totally don’t blame them!)

I immediately called my brother-in-law who was of course upset when he heard about the condition of the condo. He wrote John an email titled “Issues With Condition of Apartment” and included scary words like “stern warning” and “reeked.”

John wrote back and proved that he either grew up in a barn or is a great comedian by starting off saying “Your email comes as a shock to me. The unit is impeccably clean.”

WHAT???!

The nightmare doesn’t end there folks. Stay tuned for part two where I have a second showing in which John answers the door in his tightie whities.

What To Do While I’m Not Here

Posted in Daily Musings, Liz's Life by

Hey guys! This week is a little ridiculous for me at work and at home. I have so many projects kicking off and on top of that I am serving as my sister’s landlord for her place here in Chicago.

Needless to say, I probably won’t be posting much this week. While I’m away I wanted to share some link to some of my favorite blogs. They’re sure to meet your blog reading needs this week:

Pretty Wedding Blogs:

– http://www.oncewed.com/

– http://eatdrinkpretty.blogspot.com/

– http://stylemepretty.com/

Blogs the make me laugh:

– http://thebloggess.com/

– http://www.complicatedmama.com/

Blogs that make me laugh and cry:

– http://thespohrsaremultiplying.com/

– http://jacksjoy.wordpress.com/

Pretty picture blogs:

– http://www.traceylau.com/blog/

– http://dooce.com/

– http://www.jeremylawsonphotography.com/blog.cfm

Foodie blogs:

– http://eatingbender.com/

– http://thepioneerwoman.com/

Friend’s blogs:

– http://www.alwaysjacked.com/

– http://sydneyowen.com/

– http://peanutbutterandkelly.com/

Definitely add these folks to your Google reader! Their blogs rock.

Thanks for bearing with me through this busy week. Happy reading!

Ten Things to Do When Starting to Plan a Wedding

Posted in Wedding Planning by

My dear friend Kelly, of PeanutButterandKelly.com, recently became engaged to her boyfriend Steven aka Schmidtty. Here they are right after he popped the question…in Vegas!

Adorable, right? Kelly quickly reached out to me for help figuring out where to begin with planning her wedding. See, her and her Schmidtty are moving to AUSTRALIA (so jealous!) and need to get as much planning done for their Chicago nuptials before heading down under around the holidays.

Just going through the wedding planning process, I sent her some thought starters to get the whole process going. So here are my 10 things to do to start planning a wedding:

1. Celebrate!! Take AT LEAST a week or two to enjoy being engaged.

2. Figure out where (city) you want to get married. This should involve a discussion between you, your fiancee and parents (if they’re paying).

3. Decide on a season you’d like to get married in. I’m partial to Spring since it’s before all your friends get inundated with weddings and it won’t be unbearably hot! Fall is also a great time too.

4. Make a rough guest list to give yourself an idea of the capacity your venue will need to hold. Task your parents with helping list out family and friends. Or better yet, get your married siblings old lists!

5. Determine what’s more important to you: the venue (church or reception site) or the date. If it’s the venue, then call them immediately and see when they’re available. If it’s the date, then crowd source places you like to see if any fit your calendar.

6. If you don’t have a place in mind, then the next step is to figure out some venue options. The Internet is a great resource for finding ideal wedding locations. You can also look on local photographer’s websites to see where other couples have gotten married (that way you can research photographers AND venues at once).

7. Before setting your date in stone, research the weekend to make sure there aren’t any major conferences, sporting events or tourist traps taking place in your city that weekend. If there are, keep in mind hotel prices may be sky high and flights for guest pricey.

8. Research and book the vendors you care most about. If you have your heart set on a photographer, certain band or make up artist. Call them to lock in their availability right away. You’ll have more time to think about the auxiliary players you care less about.

9. Search for hotels close to your reception site and begin negotiations with them for a block rate. Make sure you read the contract carefully, or you might end up in a debacle like we did!

10. Set a timeline for getting your dress, bridesmaid dresses and groomsmen attire. Sometimes dresses can take up to six months, so if your engagement is short, you’ll want to start dress shopping right away.

Getting these first 10 things checked off your list will help ensure you’re is a really good place for your wedding planning. Once the above is figured out, the rest of the details will fall into place and you’ll have some time to relax and enjoy the process.

Would you guys add anything to my top ten? Rearrange the order? Let me (and Kelly) know!

PS- Congrats Kelly and Schmidtty! So happy for you guys.