Category Archives: Kids

A Beautiful Friendship

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Right now Lila and I are in San Francisco visiting my sister’s family. Luke is in Mexico for work, so I figured I might as well get out of dodge so I’m not alone until he’s home. One of the perks of not working in an office I suppose.

When we woke up Saturday morning, after arriving late on Friday, I took Lila into her cousin Mabel’s room to say hello. Mabel, who is almost exactly one year older, squealed “YiYa!!” We put the two girls in the crib together and let them play.

Since then, the time together has been filled with babbling car rides in their side by side carseats, playing blocks together, Mabel showing Lila how she eats “like a big girl” and lots of laughing and squealing back and forth.

One of the especially cute moments was when we put both girls in the tub. Lila in her bumbo (I forgot her tub) and Mabel right next to her. Both girls were playing with their toys, splashing water and giggling.

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The two girls seem to be enamored with each other. Mabel keeps asking for “more YiYa!” when she wakes up from naps and Lila keeps staring at her cousin in awe and squealing with delight at her every move.

Lila hasn’t had a ton of interaction with other babies so far, so it’s been really fun to watch her blossom around her cousin. She’s been in the BEST mood and already picked up some new developments by watching her cousin. Just this weekend she started getting up on her knees and rocking. I think because she wants to be mobile like Mabel.

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Watching them together I keep thinking two things: 1. I really need to get Lila some regular little friends to interact with and 2. She’s definitely going to need a sibling when the time is right.

I’m really happy Mabel and Lila seem to like each other so much. Cousins are such a special bond and have potential to be really close friendships. I can just imagine these girls growing up playing make believe together, probably causing trouble in college and standing up in each other’s weddings.

As the quote says, “I think this could be the start of a very beautiful friendship.”

Lessons Learned

Posted in Kids, Liz's Life by

The decision to stay home with Lila was one of the hardest I’ve faced in my life. I think mainly because I am just programmed to be an achiever and although all the “facts” made it clear staying home was the best move for our family right now, my ego had a hard time letting go of my 9-5.

See this was this decision right in the middle of the time when the debates about women in the workplace were going on. Books like “Lean In” were getting press and Marissa Mayer became CEO at Yahoo (and immediately revoked the work from home benefit). I felt like the more I read about the subject the more pressure I felt to keep working lest I be labeled someone who sold herself short.

Right when I was in the throes of sorting through this decision, a friend of mine gave me a book to read that hit right at the heart of my dilemma. The book is called “The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are” by noted Ted Talker Brene Brown.

The title itself immediately struck me. Yes. This is SO me.

I’m not sure if it’s just who I am naturally, but I tend to tie a lot of my self-worth into my achievements and namely how other perceive those achievements.

Do I have a “cool” job? Do I live in an “exotic” place? Do I have it “all together?” What am I doing that’s “unique” and “special?”

These were all questions I thought about when making big decisions. In fact, I often thought about them more than whether those decision would make me happy or were good for my family.

As I read the book, I began to realize that behind all those questions was really just my ego. My desire to be admired or to be special in some way. It’s sort of like how so many in my generation want to be famous or a CEO by age 30. The never-ending quest for greatness … but at what cost?

I began to understand that a lot of my anxiety about quitting my job to stay home with Lila was about my fear of what other’s perception would be of me. Wouldn’t I suddenly be so ordinary if I quit my “cool job” in the ski industry to be a stay at home mom? Not to mention moving from beautiful Lake Tahoe to the suburbs of Reno, NV.

But my “ah-ha” moment came when I decided that I wasn’t going to measure myself based on other’s opinions. Instead I was going to focus on what made sense for me and my family. And with our commutes and Luke’s travel, that undoubtedly was to stay home with Lila.

And you know what? When I shared my decision publicly, all the feedback I received was the opposite of what I feared. People told me they admired my courage and were proud of me. My fear of how I’d be perceived couldn’t have been more off.

I feel like I’ve grown so much since becoming a mom and I am happy to say that although this decision to stay home has been agonizing at times, I have come out on the other side learning some important lessons: that I am “enough” just being me. That If my happiness is tied to what others think, it’s always a losing game. And finally to let go of who I “think” I should be and just love who I am right now.

Because I’ve got it pretty darn good.

In the Car with Lila

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This weekend we drove to the Bay Area to visit my sister’s family. It was so nice to spend some time celebrating Easter around people we love. The weekend was filled with a trip to the farmer’s market, mass at the opera house, an Easter egg hunt at the park and finally a lovely brunch at my sister’s home.

Lila had so much fun being around her big cousin Mabel. She just kept looking at her with such adoration.

Around 3:45 on Sunday it was time to say goodbye and start the four+ hour drive home (depending on how many times we stop for Lila). I wasn’t looking forward to being in the car at all. About ten minutes into the drive, we hit traffic, that slowly turned into complete gridlock. Ugh.

Right about that same time Lila had a big poop, so while the traffic was at a standstill, I jumped into the backseat and changed her diaper right there in my lap. I was wiping her down when I looked out the window and a truck was right next to us, able to see everything going on in our backseat. Thankfully the driver smiled and looked away. We had a good laugh about that one.

With Lila all strapped back in her carseat, I jungle-gym climbed back into the front seat to settle in. We were in gridlock traffic for another hour and a half before we finally started moving. The whole time in traffic Lila was just staring intently at herself in the mirror we set up on the back seat so we can see her in the front mirror. Seriously for about an hour straight every time we looked back, she was just staring at herself with a blank face on. We cracked up every time we looked at her!

About three hours into our drive, I stopped to nurse her. We walked her around outside at a park to get her some fresh air, but all too soon we had to strap her back into her carseat. She didn’t like that AT ALL. Little sweetie was crying and complaining for about ten minutes when I got the idea to put on some children’s music on Pandora.

As soon as Journey’s “Open Arms” lullaby version started playing, girlfriend was ENTHRALLED. The crying stopped immediately. I guess she has a penchant for Journey just like her momma.

For the next 1.5 hours we shuffled through all sorts of baby music and assessed Lila’s preferences. She would smile and listen intently to anything with a xylophone (gag!) or children singing. She would squawk her disapproval for any slow lullaby or anything with an older man singing. We were thoroughly entertained.

That night after 5 1/2 hours on the road, we got home and tucked Lila into bed. I realized that what normally would have been a miserable day stuck in the car drudging through traffic, turned out to be five hours of smiling and laughing all because of our little girl.

I find that these days I can be happy doing the most mundane, even unenjoyable things, just as long as my baby is with me.

I hope you all had a wonderful Easter weekend!

Traveling Man

Posted in Kids, Lila, Liz's Life, Married Life by

Text from Luke:

“It’s not looking good for me to get on the earlier flight. On standby, but the flight is full. My original flight is delayed 1.5 hours.”

Luke has taken on a new role at his company, which means he is traveling much more than before. It started in January of this year and so far he’s gone to Mexico six times. His travel is not glamorous either. Three flights, customs, a car ride to end up at a gold mine in the heart of Mexico. One time recently the house he stayed in didn’t have heat!

This week was the first time that he’s been gone, I’ve been working full time and Lila has been in childcare during the day. Essentially, my first go-round managing a house, baby and work on my own. I realized this week just how much Luke does to keep our life running!

Cue to this morning. Wake up at 5:30 am to crying baby – feed baby – put baby back down – shower – make coffee and pack lunch – wash baby bottles and pumping gear – pack baby bag – get dressed/makeup – feed baby again – diaper and dress baby – pack up car – take trash to curb – load baby – drive to work – drop baby at daycare – make it to work at 8 …. 10 minutes late.

On a typical day, Luke will usually cover making the coffee, packing my lunch, taking the trash out, changing Lila’s diaper, washing the bottles and such …. okay so basically he does everything while I feed the baby and get myself ready.

I have a massive amount of respect for all you single moms out there.

Beyond the day to day, having Luke gone takes away an element of comfort and relaxation to our home. I have a really hard time sleeping in a big empty house and constantly spook myself with noises. Lila also hasn’t slept as well, waking up at 5 am two days in a row. Probably because I made her sleep in our room so I wouldn’t get so scared!

I also feel really bad for him when he misses things with Lila’s development. Last night she rolled over for the first time and thankfully I was able to capture it on camera so Luke could see. I know not being home for her milestones is really tough on him.

As much as I miss him when he’s away, I know everything Luke does is for me and Lila. To provide for us and secure us a financial future free of worry and stress. We’re lucky he has such a great job and with a company that values family too. Tomorrow for example, he gets to work from home and can spend all day with Lila.

Luke gets home tonight and I cannot wait. I’m going to have a clean house, steak, big kiss from me and snuggles from Lila waiting for him. Just in time too. A new text came through:

“My flight is back on time. I can’t wait to see you both tonight.”

Me either, honey.